The key to a happy marriage? Sex!
Okay, that's a vast oversimplification, but even so, this seems fairly obvious: "There's a strong relationship between rating your marriage as happy and frequency of intercourse." You don't say!
And/but: "We don't know whether people who are happy in their marriage have sex more, or whether people who have sex more become happy in their marriages, or a combination of those two." My money's on Choice #3.
(Hat tip: InstaPundit.)
There may also be a correlation between, doing IT well, as in everyone has pleasure, and doing IT frequently because everyone has pleasure. Which give everyone pleasure in having a relationship.
Posted by: Nadine | Jun 11, 2008 12:24:17 AM
Addendum to above post:
Great wine, food and conversation should also be included to derive the most benefit when doing IT.
Posted by: Nadine | Jun 11, 2008 12:28:20 AM
So that explains the long, bloggy silence between posts this afternoon/evening....
Posted by: Andrew | Jun 11, 2008 3:23:43 AM
Nadine, I realize a lot of us bloy.com readers are nerdy and tech-inclined, but I am not sure I understand the connection between IT, sex, pleasure, and marriage. Are you suggesting Luddite marriages are hopelessly doomed and loveless?
Posted by: Andrew | Jun 11, 2008 3:29:30 AM
more always helps
Posted by: CORNHUSKERS 94 95 & 97 | Jun 11, 2008 8:12:09 AM
One of the points that comes across very well in this article is that, once you "require" something to happen every day, it becomes "work". The ability to express,to share, to communicate via sexuality is much too precious to be denigrated into a "job".
Posted by: MumZ | Jun 11, 2008 9:08:15 AM
to communicate via sexuality
Hmm. Apparently I missed the signup sheet for that foreign-language major in college. ;)
Posted by: Brendan | Jun 11, 2008 10:05:02 AM
It's not how much you have sex. It is how much you have sex when both people are into it.
The three big stresses on a marriage are sex, money and kids. If you can agree on those three things most of the time, you should have a successful marriage. If you can't agree on those three things, you need some counseling.
Posted by: Angrier and Angrier | Jun 11, 2008 10:09:17 AM
Angrier I couldn't agree with you more! My wife and I nixed the kids idea years ago removing that stressor. She comes from money and knows how to handle it and I make decent money but don’t handle it well at all – so she pays all the bills and hands me an allowance every week. Maybe that makes me "less of a man" I don't know? I do know I am a less stressed man and we never argue about dough.
We had an extremely honest conversation regarding monogamy very early on (we think it is great for a lot of people – just not us) and have established our own “rules” regarding that area of our lives. After nearly 12 years of marriage we have never had a major fight. Of course we get on each other’s nerves from time to time or bicker about small things – but not one major fight. During the last decade I have watched the majority of my college friends and two siblings struggle wih their marriages, with many of them splitting up. There really does seem to be a seven year itch! Many of my friends, both male and female, live in what I would deem to be unacceptable marriages with very little communication or passion and a fair amount of selfishness and lying.
If you don’t communicate in those crucial areas that Angrier cited your marriage is probably doomed to fail or at least suck for years and that is no way to go through life.
Posted by: | Jun 11, 2008 10:55:20 AM
I guess that when you have a lot of money, never have to even send a payment, let alone worry about a bill, and can have sex with other people if you want, and don't have to raise a kid, then yeah, being married is easy. It's almost like not being married, with a sugar mama on the side.
Most of us are not on that boat.
Posted by: | Jun 11, 2008 12:55:36 PM
If you are not going to have kids, and you are not going to be monogamous, why get married? For someone to handle the money?
Posted by: MumZ | Jun 11, 2008 1:10:13 PM
"why get married?"
Convenience sex.
Posted by: Angrier and Angrier | Jun 11, 2008 2:22:28 PM
A&A - how do you stop a particular subgroup from having sex ?
Answer: Marry 'em !
Ancient wisdom in many cultures ...
Posted by: Alasdair | Jun 11, 2008 3:51:28 PM
Ack - I forgot to put the italics closure ...
So ... here ...
(blush)
Posted by: Alasdair | Jun 11, 2008 3:52:07 PM
Nadine and Andrew - why do you think I am so happy that I am an IT professional ! (grin)
Posted by: Alasdair | Jun 11, 2008 3:53:30 PM
God forbid I criticize ambiguity on the web, but re: the title of the post, sex alone can't save marraige. It has to be sex with the one to whom you're married.
Posted by: copndor | Jun 11, 2008 4:40:42 PM
Allie,
I've noticed that half of your posts are Republican hackery and the other half involve some comment about boning your wife (with half of those being suggestions about how to bone your pregnant wife to induce childbirth).
Posted by: WobblyH | Jun 11, 2008 7:30:03 PM
copndor - I came *this* close to following that particular unraveling of the topic ... (grin) ...
Posted by: Alasdair | Jun 11, 2008 8:08:58 PM
Great minds think alike... and sometimes we do too.
Posted by: copndor | Jun 11, 2008 8:27:24 PM
copndor - for all you and I know, we may each be Great Minds ... we just hide it well at times, right ?
Posted by: Alasdair | Jun 12, 2008 6:19:10 PM
Happy marriage depends on many sensitive things one of which is SEX
Posted by: Rocky | Jun 13, 2008 5:30:06 PM